The older I get, the extra I dislike being a landlord. There’s an excessive amount of potential for disappointment, misunderstanding, or outright disagreeable moments. Once you’re coping with individuals and considered one of your most respected property, the margin for frustration is excessive.
If you wish to be a profitable landlord—and never get run over—you could set expectations clearly and implement them. In any other case, you’ll always really feel such as you’re letting somebody down or, worse, being taken benefit of.
San Francisco’s Scorching Rental Market
After 20 years of being a landlord, I’ve skilled all of the cycles. And proper now, the San Francisco rental market is powerful. With house costs close to all-time highs, mortgage charges nonetheless elevated, and the continuing AI boom creating extra jobs, demand for leases appears to be rising.
Earlier this yr, my tenants of 5 years gave discover. That meant I had an opportunity to check the waters once more and re-rent my home. I listed it on Craigslist on a Tuesday and was instantly bombarded with curiosity.
By Saturday, I hosted two personal showings for glorious potential tenants. Each teams wished the place on the spot. One spouse was so excited she actually shouted: “We’ll take it! I need to transfer in proper now!” when she was dwelling.
These weren’t looky bathroom candidates both. They have been organized, enthusiastic, had nice jobs, and glorious credit score. It was tough to decide on between them, so I requested every to submit their finest supply. Inside 10 days, I had chosen the tenants, collected the deposit, and obtained the primary month’s hire.
Every part was shifting easily. Or so I believed.
Getting ready The Home For New Tenants
As a result of my spouse and I have been genuinely enthusiastic about this household, we put in additional effort to arrange the house. Over two weeks we painted partitions and trim, spackled and sanded uneven spots, scrubbed the whole lot down, and did a large quantity of yard work. It was as if we have been prepping the home on the market.
Our earlier tenants have been strong, however that they had uncared for the yard. So my children and I rolled up our sleeves and reseeded, trimmed bushes, pulled weeds, and watered the whole lot to deliver it again to life. Rental property maintenance with the kids is one thing I’ll commonly do to construct their work ethic and information. By move-in day, the home seemed recent, clear, and able to be loved.
There’s a deep satisfaction that comes from handing over a property in nice situation. It units the tone for the connection. You hope the tenants will see the delight of possession and reciprocate by taking good care of the place. Additional, you mentally really feel good understanding your property is in nice form.
The Transfer-In Demeanor Shift
On move-in day, the husband arrived early for our walkthrough. Calm, well mannered, and well-prepared, he had scheduled out the day:
- Walkthrough with me at 10 a.m.
- Good friend arriving at 11 to assist unload a van of extra delicate gadgets the tenant introduced.
- Essential movers coming at 11:30 with a big truck.
Every part about him appeared orderly and respectful.
The spouse confirmed up later, round 11:15, clearly confused from the packing and logistics at their outdated place. The enjoyment she’d proven when she shouted, “I need to transfer in proper now!” was nowhere to be discovered.
Once I greeted her with a smile and a “hiya,” she barely seemed up. No huge deal, I informed myself—this can be a enterprise transaction, not a friendship. Shifting is worrying and loads will need to have been on her thoughts.
I wrapped up the walkthrough, defined all of the nuances and upkeep tips on the home, handed over the keys, and wished them the very best.
The Shock Request
Every week later, I occurred to be driving by and noticed them outdoors working within the yard. This was encouraging. I pulled over to say “hiya,” and shortly seize a sizzling tub stool and a few chlorine bottles I’d left in outside storage.
The husband was pleasant, asking how I used to be doing. However the spouse instantly hit me with:
“Hey, I’ve received a query for you. Are you able to get some mulch and also you pay for it? There are some naked spots right here and particularly within the again.”
No “hiya.” No “thanks for the clear yard.” No “the home is nice.” Only a request.
Her tone caught me off guard. I anticipated some acknowledgment of the work we’d already achieved. As an alternative, I felt like an worker being given a directive, one thing I’m now not accustomed to after retiring in 2012. All these hours my children and I had spent reseeding, trimming, and watering? Apparently meaningless or not ok to their requirements.
I muttered a noncommittal, “Perhaps,” and left with a “goodbye” for good measure. I wanted time to consider requests after the lease was signed.
Setting Clear Expectations
I delight myself on offering an awesome product for the hire individuals pay. That’s why this rubbed me the fallacious approach.
My lease—which I’ve been refining since 2005—is a number of pages lengthy and really clear. Nowhere does it say the owner should present mulch. In reality, it explicitly states tenants are answerable for sustaining the yard and crops.
Throughout the personal exhibiting, they by no means talked about mulch. Throughout lease evaluation and edits, mulch by no means got here up. Solely after signing did this “expectation” floor.
That is precisely why setting clear expectations is so necessary. If one thing isn’t within the lease, it shouldn’t out of the blue turn into a requirement.
The Slippery Slope Of Giving In
Right here’s the hazard: when you begin giving in to additional requests, expectations balloon.
In case you purchase and unfold mulch, what’s subsequent? A Toto Washlet at your expense? Contemporary landscaping? A repainted entrance door of their favourite colour when the outdated door was completely fantastic? The checklist could possibly be countless.
Tenants are free to ask, however landlords want to guard themselves and are free to additionally say no. In case you oblige each request, you threat blurring the boundaries. Your position shifts from proprietor to on-call service supplier. That semi-passive income no begins turning into lively earnings, which is what you need to keep away from.
And when your revenue margins are already squeezed by property taxes, mortgage curiosity, upkeep, and the occasional late hire, doing unpaid “extras” can tip your rental into unprofitability.
Worse than the cash is the psychological power drain. As soon as you identify your self as a landlord who at all times says sure, saying no later turns into a lot more durable. Bear in mind, as somebody searching for monetary independence, your property should give you the results you want, not the opposite approach round.
Discovering A Compromise
After sleeping on it, I made a decision to supply a center floor. I emailed the husband—who had been well mannered {and professional} from the beginning—and informed him I’d reimburse as much as $150 for mulch. They may decide it up themselves and unfold it round. At roughly $10 a bag, that might cowl about 15–16 baggage, which felt affordable.
This fashion, I wasn’t setting the precedent of turning into their private landscaper, however I used to be nonetheless exhibiting some flexibility. To make issues simpler, I even informed them which retailer to go to and precisely the place to search out the mulch. It was a small gesture, however I wished to begin the connection off on the precise foot. A bit goodwill at first can go a good distance over the course of a tenancy.
They accepted immediately and appeared genuinely grateful. Because it seems, at their final rental, the owner anticipated them to mulch the backyard each single yr, in order that they assumed that was commonplace.
I defined that I hadn’t seen the naked spots sufficient to make it a part of the lease, however since they introduced it up, I used to be fantastic with refreshing it each couple of years if wanted. I even urged they spray some Rock Glue to assist maintain the mulch in place and informed them I’d cowl the price of that too.
In the long run, what may have been a sticking level become a small win-win. They’ll get the spruced-up yard they wished, and I received peace of thoughts understanding we’d began our landlord-tenant relationship with a little bit cooperation as a substitute of battle.
I’m assured they’ll become nice, caring tenants—that’s why I selected them within the first place. To start with, it’s at all times a leap of religion.
Why Strict Guidelines Construct Higher Relationships
Assume again to high school. Bear in mind the strict trainer who laid out guidelines from day one? At first, you thought she was harsh. However by the top of the yr, she was your favourite trainer. Why? As a result of the foundations have been clear, honest, and constant.
The identical precept applies right here. Clear guidelines create mutual respect. They simply must be reviewed and understood by each events.
In case you’re a tenant: learn the lease fastidiously, ask questions earlier than signing, and make clear expectations upfront.
In case you’re a landlord: evaluation the lease line by line, spotlight tenant duties, and provides tenants a day or two to lift questions. You have to be as thorough as potential. Hold bettering upon your lease for subsequent time.
That small effort on the entrance finish can prevent monumental frustration down the street.
Why I’m Lowering My Landlord Publicity
Interacting with individuals might be draining, particularly when expectations don’t line up or the requests really feel unreasonable. Take my outdated tenants, for instance. They wished me to purchase three lighting fixtures that they had put in. I declined. I had already been versatile in letting them swap out the unique fixtures, so I informed them they may both depart their new ones behind or reinstall mine.
They weren’t thrilled with that reply. Actually, I discovered the entire trade exhausting. I by no means would have requested my landlord to buy lighting fixtures I selected for myself. Perhaps it was a cultural difference. However to me, it simply felt like one other reminder of how mismatched expectations can create pointless friction.
If I had merely caught to the foundations and mentioned no to swapping out the unique lighting fixtures, this pointless trade would not have taken place. However that is what you typically get for attempting to be versatile and good.
Though proudly owning rental properties is among the finest methods to construct wealth and safe your retirement, I’ve merely reached my restrict for eager to cope with all the problems. I can not wait to promote one other rental property in a few years to qualify for the tax-free exclusion rule.
Landlording Can Be Like Working A Company Job
One of many essential causes I left company America was as a result of individuals. Workplace politics, tough personalities, and fixed requests wore me down after 13 years.
Being a landlord is usually no totally different. Even with supposedly “good” tenants, points come up. That’s why, although I’m nonetheless bullish long-term on San Francisco actual property, I accepted a preemptive offer in 2025 for my outdated main residence that was a rental for one yr.
I reinvested 100% of the proceeds into the S&P 500, particular person shares, Treasury bonds, and venture capital—investments that require zero individuals administration. Shifting semi-passive rental earnings into actually passive investments has been a reduction.
Classes Realized For Landlords
Listed below are the primary takeaways from this expertise:
- Set clear expectations upfront. Your lease is your rulebook. Don’t depend on verbal understandings.
- Don’t change the phrases midstream. If it’s not within the lease, it’s non-compulsory, not obligatory.
- Watch out with “extras.” When you begin saying sure, tenants might maintain asking for extra.
- Shield your margins. Bills creep shortly; don’t let small favors flip into huge, ongoing obligations.
- Respect goes each methods. Kindness and courtesy matter. Tenants who deal with you effectively deserve extra flexibility than those that don’t. Use your emotional intelligence to make life simpler.
In my subsequent lease settlement, I plan to spell out extra particulars round exterior upkeep, make clear that the property is rented “as is,” and specify that tenants might make enhancements or aesthetic adjustments solely with prior approval—and at their very own expense.
It is good to be taught from each new tenant to make the subsequent expertise higher.
Let’s All Perceive And Observe The Lease
On the finish of the day, each landlords and tenants desire a optimistic expertise. Tenants need worth for what they pay. Landlords need tenants who take care of the property and are self-sufficient. Neither get together needs to maintain going backwards and forwards with one another throughout your entire time of keep.
This stability is achievable, however solely when either side clearly perceive and observe the lease. With out expectations, frustration grows. With them, the connection has an actual likelihood of succeeding.
Landlords, have you ever ever had tenants ask for issues that went past the lease? How did you deal with it—did you accommodate, push again, or discover a center floor? And tenants, I’d love to listen to your facet too. Have you ever ever satisfied a landlord to go above and past what was in your lease? If that’s the case, how did you pull it off?
On the finish of the day, I believe setting expectations is the inspiration of a clean landlord-tenant relationship. However I’m curious—how necessary do you suppose it truly is, and the place do you draw the road?
Spend money on Actual Property, With out the Complications
Don’t need to cope with tenants, late-night upkeep calls, or chasing hire checks—however nonetheless need publicity to actual property? Try Fundrise. With over $3 billion in property below administration and a minimal funding of simply $10,
Fundrise focuses on build-to-rent residential and industrial properties in additional reasonably priced elements of the nation. They deal with the acquisitions, tenants, and property administration—so you may sit again and concentrate on the elements of life you truly take pleasure in.
I’ve personally invested over $500,000 throughout a number of Fundrise funds and a number of other accounts, they usually’ve been a long-time sponsor of Monetary Samurai. With the Fed slicing charges once more and three years of underbuilding as a result of excessive financing prices, I anticipate to see continued upward stress on rents within the years forward.
